Called to Motherhood

Mother Of Two Just Talking It Out

I’m sure you were all just DYING to know. April 11, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — Ashley @ 9:21 am

Here are just a few things going on in the life of Ashley…

1. The kids have been waking up at least twice a night for the past week or so and it is making me crazy! I am not one that can function on little sleep so I may need to apologize for some grumpy behavior lately. Although, last night we got 8 hours(!) of uninterrupted sleep. It was amazing. I feel like a new woman!

2. I’m back, baby! In drama, that is. I officially turned in my notice for Praise Team last month so I could focus 100% on my true passion: Drama Ministry. Never in my life had I ever thought that I’d turn down any form of music for acting but that’s just one tiny lesson in “never say never”. I am so stinkin thrilled about it, though. Currently we’re working on a 30 minute (not a full length production but much bigger than a regular weekend sketch) show for the Lit Conference on the 29th. That’s just 3 weeks away and we need to be off book by Monday night. So, if you talk to me and all I say are phrases that don’t pertain to the conversation at hand, don’t think anything of it.

3. I have been doing Weight Watchers for 6 weeks now and I have lost 10 1/2 pounds! Yipee! My goal is 20 and I still have 5 weeks before we go to the beach so it should be doable. Not only has WW been a great tool in helping me lose the baby weight, it has also given me a real desire to teach my family to eat and live a bit healthier. I’m definitely feeling it!

So, that’s it! I know it’s not much but I actually prefer the uneventful, if-i-don’t-have-to-leave-the-house-then-i-won’t kind of lifestyle. That’s just how we roll up here on The Hill.

 

So maybe he has enough hair for a regular sized head but his is far from regular? It’s just a theory. April 7, 2010

Filed under: Landon — Ashley @ 2:02 pm

It would appear that my kid has a GIANT head. That’s Grace’s hat…correction…that’s Grace’s toddler sized hat. Although, I seem to remember seeing pictures of a certain little Flores boy with a big head. It’s ok, Landon, you’ll grow into it.

 

Good Times March 29, 2010

Filed under: Grace,Landon — Ashley @ 9:41 am

 

When she says “booty” she really means his “man-parts”. March 22, 2010

Filed under: Grace — Ashley @ 3:38 pm

Grace and Landon in the bath…

Grace: “Mommy, Landon’s booty is uncovered.”

Ashley: “Well, it’s ok.”

Grace: (a little whiney) “Mommy, I can see his booty. Cover it up.”

Ashley: “Honey, don’t worry about it.”

Grace: (now in panic mode) “MOMMY, YOU HAVE TO COVER LANDON’S BOOTY! I DON’T WANT TO LOOK AT IT!!”

 

Read this now. You’ll thank me later. March 14, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — Ashley @ 2:23 pm

Words of wisdom from our quick and impromptu trip to St. Simon’s Island:

1. If it looks like a ghetto Krystal and it tastes like a ghetto Krystal, it probably is a ghetto Krystal. Don’t eat there. It will be the worst Krystal in the history of Krystals.

2. If it looks like a ghetto Red Roof Inn and is in the SAME PARKING LOT as the ghetto Krystal, it probably is a ghetto Red Roof Inn. Don’t stay there. It may only cost $50 a night but just go ahead and splurge. You’ll be glad you did.

Like I said, you’ll thank me later.

 

Confessions Of A 3 year-old Shopaholic March 13, 2010

Filed under: Grace — Ashley @ 3:35 pm

Earlier this afternoon…

Grace: “Why didn’t we go to Target today?”

Ashley: “Well, I didn’t want to go to Target. I had a coupon for JCPenney.”

Grace: “Mom, why do you always have to have a coupon?”

Ashley: “If you have a coupon, you don’t have to use as much money.”

Grace: “Ok, well, will you please call Daddy and ask him if he’ll take me to Target tomorrow? They’re having a sale.”

From the mouth of babes…

 

Seriously, where ARE their parents?!? February 8, 2010

Filed under: Uncategorized — Ashley @ 9:36 am

I wish I could take credit for writing this but I definitely didn’t. I saw it on a blog and thought it was too funny to keep to myself. I know that me, Mom and Erin have discussed this more than once.

Dear Nick Jr. (formerly known as Noggin but still really known as Noggin because I don’t know of one single person who calls it Nick Jr because, let’s face it, Noggin is just a cuter name, I’m just sayin’),

(inhales)

I am writing to inform you that very soon I will be putting in a call to Social Services to report the gross parental negligence I have observed by many of the residents of your Nickelodeon Neighborhood.

Let’s take, for example, Max and Ruby. After 11 months of observation I have never, EVER seen their parents. As in I’m pretty sure they don’t even exist. The children are constantly home alone, only being dropped in upon, every once in a while, by their grandmother. Max, obviously a child two or under seeing as how he can only speak one word at a time, is being cared for by his sister, Ruby, who can’t possibly be more than six years old seeing as how she’s an idiot. I do not feel this is a good environment for either child and thus will be reporting the Bunny Family to the proper authorities. I am glad that Ruby has her ever-true Bunny Scout Leader to guide her although I don’t think the party-hosting skills she is being taught are going to prove very beneficial in the raising of her younger brother.

I am also very concerned about Dora the Abnormally Large Headed Explorer. Although her parents, Sr. and Sra. Marquez, do appear every now and again, she is often seen out on her own, accompanied only by a whiny monkey. She has faced many a foe (a witch, a troll, a fox) with only her backpack to protect her. And I know she always uses her seatbelt “so she can be safe,” but am I mistaken that Dora should still be in a car seat? I am fairly certain she does not meet the eight year / 80 pound requirement. Although I suppose this law may not apply when you are traveling to OUTER SPACE, you know, by yourself.

Lastly, I will be reporting ALL of the neglectful animal parents whose children have found themselves in such peril they’ve had to call on the Wonder Pets. I feel if you are relying on a guinea pig, a turtle, and a baby duck to rescue your children, you have reached a whole new level of inattention. I’m sorry but if you, as a goose, flew off and left your children to be led south by some classroom pets in a plastic boat, don’t you think you should be reported? And don’t even get me started on the ladybug’s parents who let her play in the Venus Fly Trap or the Mama cow who barely reacted when her baby calf was rescued from a tree (that’s right, a tree).

The parents of all the Backyardigans are still under observation, and at this point, there is no reason to suspect negligence on their part. So far, the children have stayed within the confines of their backyard, and at least one parent seems to be home during their playtime, offering a delightful yet nutritious snack at the end of their imaginary adventures.

Please be under advisement that the entire Nickelodeon Junior (if that’s your real name) populace is being watched.

Yours Truly,
A Concerned Mother

P.S. – And as far as DJ Lance is concerned, the whole Gabba Family is currently under investigation for recreational drug use. Second letter to follow.